24/07/2008

Birthday Gifts

It was Raymond Chandler's 120th birthday yesterday and the LATimes asked some influential mystery folks what gift they'd offer him.
 
I, too, have some presents for the father of Philip Marlowe - because he's worth it.
 
First, the complete works of one of his favorite authors. Should bring back fond memories of fruitful, if passionate, arguments.
 
Second, a dedicated photo of Alfred Hitchcock as a souvenir of their friendly, mutually-respecting collaboration on Strangers on a Train.
 
Third and final - I'm rather short of money and you shouldn't offer a dead centenarian too many gifts, that might spoil him - my own copy of The Simple Art of Murder, complete with my uncensored annotations.
 
Happy birthday, Raymond.
 
P.S.: This article is, of course, satirical and not to be taken seriously. Never would I give away my copy of TSAM - not for free.
And my annotations are quite polite, except for a tiny handful occupying roughly the three quarters of the volume. Otherwise it's pretty G-rated stuff.

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